Tik tok, tik tok goes the clock as I count the remaining days, the remaining hours and the remaining seconds of my life as a college student. In less than a week from now, the end of the road I worked hard for nearly a quarter of my life has finally come to an end. Me and some hundred or so students will be marching at the Philippine International Convention Center for our commencement rites this coming Saturday.

Such a shame though that the kickstart to the end was completely ruined because of the rains the wrecked havoc across Manila which left our place flooded to almost hip-deep levels. Such a shame that CSB actually pushed through with the graduation rehearsal and class picture-taking scheduled for that day. It was really heart-wrenching to know that a lot of my batchmates actually took the effort on going there and I didn’t because it was actually impossible on my end to go to southward to Manila given my situation.

I was crying later that night. I didn’t want to accept that it happened. That college class picture plus the rehearsal was to be one of the defining moments for my send-off from school and both didn’t happen. I was really looking forward to it and fortunately for others, they know have some extra something special to remember forever in their college lives that I will never get to experience ever.

By coincidence, this is such a huge recall as this is more or less a shout-out from 13 years ago when I wasn’t able to take part in what could have ben my very first grade school class picture because I contracted a case of chickenpox from my little brother which was the same reason why he wasn’t able to go to our school field trip to Tagaytay a week before.

Realizing that, I just couldn’t help but feel depress. Even up til now, I still can’t get over the fact that one of things that I should have experienced in college will no longer happen. I jsut hate it, simply hate. Even the thought of me makes me wanna punch a hole or something.

Sayang…I was telling Danya that we’re both going to brave the flood just so we could get to the venue in time. The day before I was hoping the flood would recede to the point that it’s low enough for jeeps to travel on passable routes and I could ride on a tricycle de padyak to take me to the temporary loading bays for jeeps at the barangay’s central area. But on the day itself, the floodwaters outside the house rose up overnight, reaching our garage inside. Adding insult to injury is the unpredictable rainshowers coming on and off throughout the day before completely halting by day’s end. Plus, my dad would never allow to go out at that point.

I could have been there…I should have been there. It’s just frustrating I know but there’s nothing that I could do now. I just have to force myself to move on or at least comes to terms over these feelings of regret and frustrations.

On the brighter side of things, I just have to make sure that I won’t miss the big day itself, GRADUATION DAY. Fearing that I might end up like one of my high school friends who missed his own commencement rites yesterday because of the weather, I already asked my mom to book a reservation at Traders Hotel just in case CSB foolishly goes ahead with the event at the height of a storm. They better not.

And yeah, I’m planning on having a much-needed haircut after two months of letting it grow to look like a beatlecut from the 1960’s hehehe.

I’m really hoping that nothing would stop me from living and re-living this moment. I already missed out the rehearsal and the class picture (which I hope it doesn’t end up on the yearbook at this point) so I’m making sure I’m going to get the perfect treat of an ending for my CSB EXPERIENCE.

Bow! 😀